


The Life of Hope’s Peak Academy

by ScottishScurrie



Category: Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, Alternate Universe - High School, Alternate Universe - No Killing Game (Dangan Ronpa), Alternate Universe - No Ultimate Talents (Dangan Ronpa), Alternate Universe - Non-Despair (Dangan Ronpa), Angie and Kork are buds, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Aromantic Byakuya Togami, Background Relationships, Bonding, Chaos. Chaos everywhere., Dork Ishimaru Kiyotaka, Enoshima Junko Being An Asshole, Eventual Relationships, Eventual Romance, F/F, Female Relationships, First chapter will be shorter because it’s just an introduction, Fluff, Fluff and Humor, Gay, Gay Panic, Hagakure and Ishimaru are step-siblings, Hoshi Ryoma has depression, How Do I Tag, Human K1-B0 (Dangan Ronpa), I'm Bad At Tagging, Ibuki and Ishimaru are cousins, Implied Sexual Content, Implied/Referenced Abuse, Implied/Referenced Attempted Suicide, Implied/Referenced Child Abuse, Implied/Referenced Homophobia, Implied/Referenced Self-Harm, Ishimaru Kiyotaka has depression, Ishimaru has a lot of relatives oop-, Ishimaru’s mother is called Nomi, It’s a slow burn for literally everyone y’all, I’m unoriginal, Komaeda Nagito Being Komaeda Nagito, Kuwata Leon is also a cool dude, M/M, Male Homosexuality, Male Pronouns for Fujisaki Chihiro, Memes, Multi, Mutual Pining, Non-Incestuous Shinguji Korekiyo, Not everyone is in first chapter, Oma Kokichi Being Oma Kokichi, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Panic Attacks, Past Child Abuse, Pure Gokuhara Gonta, References to Depression, Self-Esteem Issues, Slow Burn, Sometimes it’s a chatfic and sometimes it’s not, Teen Angst, There’s Theatre Kids because of course there is, They’re referenced but they’re more like hobbies here, Yasuhiro Hagakure is actually a cool dude, the gay is everywhere, this might get dark at times
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-04-24
Updated: 2020-08-19
Packaged: 2021-03-02 00:07:49
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 10,769
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23685901
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ScottishScurrie/pseuds/ScottishScurrie
Summary: Follow the school lives of the students of Hope’s Peak Academy! I wonder what’ll happen?
Relationships: Celestia Ludenberg/Sonia Nevermind, Chabashira Tenko/Yumeno Himiko, Fujisaki Chihiro/Leon Kuwata, Fukawa Touko/Naegi Komaru, Gokuhara Gonta/Hoshi Ryoma, Hinata Hajime/Komaeda Nagito/Nanami Chiaki, Hiroko Hagakure/Ishimaru’s Mother, Ishimaru Kiyotaka/Oowada Mondo, Mioda Ibuki/Tsumiki Mikan, Naegi Makoto/Togami Byakuya (One-sided), Oma Kokichi/Saihara Shuichi, Soda Kazuichi/Tanaka Gundham
Comments: 45
Kudos: 116





	1. Introduction

**Author's Note:**

> I apologise if anyone is OOC and if I spelled any characters names wrong :’)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The first day! This is going to be interesting...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Some characters may be a little OOC, which I apologise for :’)

It was early in the day, everyone was settling down for class. The late people scurried in quickly just as the bell went. Everything was peaceful... That was until there was a large shrieking sound in the hallway.

Then suddenly the fire alarm went off and the sprinklers came on. Everyone collectively groaned and they made their way outside, all are varying paces.

The first ones outside were the group that their fellow students refer to as ‘The Chaotic Gang’, which consisted of Keebo(who does nothing but just tags along with the two so they don’t do anything _too_ illegal), Miu Iruma and Kokichi Ouma. Practically everyone feared them because... well.... their name can be an indicator. 

The moment everyone got outside, rumours were already spreading.

‘I heard that Nagito accidentally set something on fire...’

‘I heard that Mukoro attempted to set the school on fire...’

‘I heard that...’ and they went on and on.

One of the last students to arrive was Ishimaru, the Hall Monitor who was presumably making sure nobody was left behind.

Once the school was cleared, it was confirmed that it was just an error. They all went back in and dried off everything before they went back to class.

Thankfully, the majority of the students paid attention to their classes afterwards... Now it was time for break. This was going to be interesting...

Kokichi was pestering a fellow classmate of his, Shuichi Saihara.

“Nope. I’m not doing that. No thanks.” Shuichi Said, trying to walk away from the childish purple haired boy.

“Come ooon! It’ll be fun!” Kokichi said, following after Shuichi.

“I’m not jumping into a lake, Kokichi! I’m already wet enough thanks to the sprinklers!” Shuichi said, sighing.

Kokichi then whispered something, very quietly to Shuichi which made the other boy kick him in the shins, before walking off.

Kokichi fell to the ground, a little too dramatically.

“OW!” He said, so loudly that a couple of people looked over with a strange look on their face.

One of those people were Korekiyo Shinguji.

He turned to Angie, who he was sitting next to him.

“Human emotions are so varied and fascinating.” He said, looking down at the sandwich he was eating.

Angie nodded.

“Atua says that Kokichi probably deserved being kicked by Shuichi! I just wonder what he said...” Angie Said, whispering the last part to herself.

Korekiyo nodded.

“That’s very likely.” 

After a couple of minutes Kokichi got up like nothing happened and ran back over to Shuichi.

Korekiyo shook his head in disappointment.

“Does he ever learn?”

Angie also shook her head.

“From what Angie has seen, no he doesn’t.” She said, sighing.

Meanwhile in the grass field.

Gonta and Ryoma were sat in a field with flowers on the hill, looking for bugs.

“Gonta very happy that Ryoma likes spending time with Gonta! Gonta don’t have many friends...” Gonta said, frowning.

“Well, whoever isn’t friends with you is missing out. You’re a good guy, Gonta.”

Gonta smiled, though it was short lived seeing as the bell rang all of a sudden. The pair then sprinted down the hill so they wouldn’t be late.

The classes that lead afterwards were pretty uneventful, though Kokichi did crack a couple of... interesting jokes which gained a couple laughs.

Then lunch rolled around. What happened at lunch was always more interesting than what happened at break.

The most shenanigans were caused by the 2nd most Chaotic group in the school, though they might as well be the first because everyday _something_ happens to either of them or the trio.

Who did this group consist of?

The infamous Nagito Komaeda, Hajime Hinata and finally, Chiaki Nanami. They were known throughout the entire school for being absolutely mental, or at least Nagito was... Once the entire school fell to the ground thanks to him. Nobody knows how or why but everyone knows it was him... But hey they got like, a month of school so who cares! (Ishimaru did care but nobody really listens to him...)

Then there was the 3rd group that causes the most shenanigans. The ‘Original Chaotic Group’ which had Local Rich Boy Byakuya Togami, The most luckiest and unluckiest person to ever exist Makoto Naegi and Cospiracy Theorist Kyoko Kirigiri. They aren’t even close to the Chaos anymore but they used to be thanks to Makoto.

And the groups and the cliques go on and on... You’ve got the sporty kids, The musical kids, the creative kids and... You get the idea. Very few get their own names like the Chaotic groups do. Though, there are the sub-groups too... but we won’t be going into those because it’ll take up the entire day probably.

Everyone got along... Mostly.

“GET AWAY FROM HER YOU DEGENERATE MALE!” Tenko yelled.

Gonta made the mistake of hugging Himiko once. That situation didn’t end up well. Ryoma and Tenko both ended up in detention because things got a bit... out of hand. Ishimaru wasn’t happy with them for a month.

Many shenanigans happen within the walls of Hope’s Peak everyday. This series will follow those shenanigans! You better buckle up and get some snacks because this is going to get interesting!


	2. Miss Keisha, Miss Keisha!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ryoma has been absent for a while and his classmates begin to get worried.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW FOR ATTEMPTED SUICIDE!  
> Mentions of depression and (kind of) drug misuse??
> 
> ALSO CHATFIC TIME Y’ALL
> 
> !Nicknames!  
> Gonta - Ant-Man  
> Ryoma - Garfield  
> Kaede - Stuck in the Pantry  
> Korekiyo - Seesaw  
> Rantaro - Fresh Avocado  
> Kaito - Fly Me to The Moon  
> Tenko - Black Widow but she hates guys  
> Himiko - Black Magic  
> Shuichi - RawrXD  
> Kokichi - Gremlin Boy  
> Kirumi - Mom  
> K1-B0 - I’m a Real Boy!  
> Miu - *censored*  
> Angie - Jesus Christ
> 
> Egg - Makoto  
> Bike - Mondo  
> Weed - Hagakure  
> Baseball Dave - Leon  
> The All mighty hall monitor - Ishimaru  
> Fish - Aoi  
> Bitch better have my money - Byakua  
> Despair Queen - Junko

#### Gucci Gang 5:43PM

Fly Me to The Moon: Yo, has anyone seen Ryoma? He hasn’t been attending any classes this week and I haven’t seen him around.

Gremlin Boy: Why are you asking us? Shouldn’t you be asking bug boy? He hangs out with him a little too much...

Fly Me to The Moon: Who the fuck is Bug Boy-

RawrXD: I think he’s referring to Gonta

Fly Me to The Moon: oHHH YEAH OOP

Fresh Avocado: .... Did- Did you just seriously forget about gonta???

Fly Me to The Moon: Look, I don’t have any classes with him-

Gremlin Boy: HEIFBWIFBEINDEIBDIWBDJ HE’S KINDA HARD TO MISS THO

Fresh Avocado: kokichi does have a point

Fly Me to The Moon: lOOK

Fly Me to The Moon: WE GOT A MISSING PERSON HERE- RYOMA COUNTS AS A MISSING PERSON NOW SO LIKE... SHOULDN’T WE LOOK FOR HIM??

Fresh Avocado: That’s probably the best idea you’ve ever came up with.

Fly Me to The Moon: wow thanks 

[6:11PM]

Stuck in the Pantry: Wait,,, who’s missing??

Fly Me to The Moon: fUCKIN RYOMA

Stuck in the Pantry: Oh. I’ll help you look!

Fly Me to The Moon: THANK YOU KAEDE BECAUSE I SWEAR IF KAZUICHI DOESN’T STOP YELLING POLICE NOISES I’M GOING TO START LOSING IT-

Gremlin Boy: Police Noises

Stuck in the Pantry: Police Noises

RawrXD: Police Noises

Mom: Police Noises

Fresh Avocado: Police Noises

Fly Me to The Moon: you guys sure are helping

[7:37]

RawrXD: uhm have we considered the fact... that he might be dead?

Fly Me to The Moon: What makes ya say that?!

RawrXD: I went to the nurse’s office and she gave me some... information about ryoma.

Fly me to The Moon: Oh no-

RawrXD: He’s uh... Had 2 attempted suicide attempts in the past.

RawrXD: who the fuck just screamed-

Fly Me To The Moon: it was Kazuichi, i just told him this information and... yeah he just... y’know, screamed.

Gremlin Boy: What the fuck did I miss-

Gremlin Boy: o h

Fly me to The Moon: yeah that’s a mood

RawrXD: has anyone actually looked in his room?

Fly me to The Moon: it’s locked

RawrXD: Oh no- Uh- Let me go get Ishimaru so he can open it...

Fly me to The Moon: Why would he have a key to Ryoma’s room??

RawrXD: Kirigiri found a key that can open any door, window, ECT in the school so she gave it to Ishimaru because he’s the only one she’d know who wouldn’t misuse it. He only uses it in emergencies though but... this kinda is.

#### DM to Kiyotaka Ishimaru

Shuichi Saihara: Yo uhhh, Ishimaru?

Kiyotaka Ishimaru: Yes, Saihara?

Shuichi Saihara: Do you still have that key that opens every door in the school?

Kiyotaka Ishimaru: Yes, of course I do. Why?

Shuichi Saihara: One of our classmates, Hoshi hasn’t been attending classes for a week and nobody has seen him around campus. We’re worried and I also acquired some information about him that might make this emergency level.

Kiyotaka Ishimaru: Ah. I see... What is this information you speak of?

Shuichi Saihara: He’s had a history of attempted suicide. Everyone is worried that he’s done it again.

Kiyotaka Ishimaru: Oh! I see. Yes, I shall grant you the key. I’ll meet you at Hoshi’s room in 5 minutes.

Shuichi Saihara: Alright. Thanks, Ishimaru.

Kiyotaka Ishimaru: No problem.

#### Gucci Gang

RawrXD: I’ve got the key! Meet me outside Hoshi’s room, alright?

Fly me to The Moon: Already there!

~

Shuichi put his phone in his pocket, sighing.

He began to walk in the direction of Ryoma’s room but within minutes his phone was buzzing again.

#### Gucci Gang

Fly Me to The Moon: Update time,, He ain’t waking up

RawrXD: What do you mean he isn’t waking up??

Stuck in The Pantry: Check the pulse.

Fly Me to The Moon: ... What does like, uh, so slow he might as well be dead mean?

Stuck in the Pantry: Oh my god. I’m getting Mikan.

*censored*: What are you virgins doing that’s so important that you leave like, 200+ messages?!

Stuck in the Pantry: This really isn’t the time, Miu.

Gremlin Boy: As much as I hate to agree with Kayayde... Yeah.

Fresh Avocado: ... holy shit this escalated more than i thought it would wow

*censored*: what escalated?! 

Fresh Avocado: from what I’ve got, Ryoma could be dead. Like, deader than roadkill.

*censored*: ah.

Gremlin Boy: oK CAN SOMEONE TELL KAZUICHI AND MONDO TO SHUT THE FUCK UP?? I CAN HEAR THEM FROM THE SCIENCE CORRIDOR

Stuck in the Pantry: Why are you in the science corridor?

Gremlin Boy: I’M LOOKING ON GOOGLE ON HOW TO REVIVE PEOPLE

Jesus Christ: Oh! Angie already knows how to do that! Google isn’t very reliable for resurrections... Angie got one method off of Google and Angie accidentally summoned the devil into the body!

Fly Me to The Moon: what-

Stuck in the Pantry: how do you accidentally summon the devil-

Jesus Christ: Angie does not know! She had to get Korekiyo to exorcise it!

Fly Me to The Moon: again... what-

Jesus Christ: Korekiyo is very good at exorcisms! If anything goes south, just call Angie and Korekiyo! Nyahah!

Fly Me to The Moon: will we have to sacrifice anyone?

Jesus Christ: Oh Yes! Loads of blood shall be shed whenever you ask Atua for help!

Fly Me to The Moon: no thanks I’d rather live with demon Ryoma than have many people die, thanks.

Jesus Christ: If you say so! Angie will be off now! Byeeee!

Fly Me to The Moon: remind me to never ask Angie for help. Ever.

Stuck in the Pantry: Noted.

Fly Me to The Moon: Another update, Ryoma still ain’t waking up.

Stuck in the Pantry: Me and Mikan are on our way!

Gremlin Boy: wHO JUST RAN OVER HIYOKO ON THE STRETCHER LMAO

Stuck in the Pantry: fuck.

Mom: >:(

Stuck in the Pantry: Sorry Kirumi!!! I swear it was an accident!!!

Mom: Ok. I’m not mad, just disappointed.

Gremlin Boy: Oh shiiiiit-

Stuck in the Pantry: :(

#### We the oldest but we dumbass

Egg: why did mikan and kaede just run past with a stretcher-

Bike: dude.

Egg: what? have i missed something?

Bike: DUDE.

Weed: i also second with makoto, what the fuck is going on?

Baseball Dave: i third with these guys, what the fiddly fuck is going on?

Bike: have you guys been living under a fucking rock???

Weed: uh, yeah? get with the times, mondo smh.

Bike: HOSHI MIGHT BE FUCKIN DEAD, YOU MORONS-

Weed: .... that lil tennis player that’s like, the size of a peanut???

Bike: Y E S.

Weed: oh shit-

Baseball Dave: are you joking or-

Bike: DOES IT LOOK LIKE I’M JOKING?

Baseball Dave: uh... no.

Egg: is that why I heard someone playing police sirens on their phone earlier?

Bike: yeah, that was souda.

The all mighty all monitor: Yeah, Hoshi might be deceased.

Baseball Dave: OH SHIT REALLY???

Fish: Wait, who’s dead??

Bike: Nobody’s dead... yet, but Hoshi might be soon.

Fish: .-.

Weed: BYAKUA CAN YOUR MONEY REVIVE HIM-

Bitch better have my money: I’m not wasting my family’s hard earned money on a low-life, filthy criminal like him. Plus, I heard that those weirdos from one of the other classes are going to ‘revive’ him themselves.

The all mighty hall monitor: I’m going to ask you to refrain from calling Hoshi those things. It’s not wise to call someone that might be dead as we speak such hurtful things.

Bitch better have my money: Why? It’s not like he’s going to rise from the dead and come after me.

The all mighty hall monitor: No, but it’s something call dignity that you lack dearly.

Weed: 👀

Baseball Dave: 👀

Despair Queen: GO OFF ISHIMARU!

Bitch better have my money: Oh. I’m sorry that I broke your stupid morals. Look, I know you can’t take a hint but I might as well try to drill it on your thick brain that’s too obsessed with rules, I. Don’t. Care. Oh no, he’s dead. People die all the time. We can’t stand and grieve over stupid things that we can’t change otherwise we’d all go soft. I know your not the smartest tool in the shed so I’ll just simplify it for you. He’s dead. Get over it.

The all mighty hall monitor: ... It seems that you want me gone, then. Maybe I should take a note out of Hoshi’s book.

Bike: what

Weed: what

Baseball Dave: what

Fish: what

Egg: what

Despair Queen: what

Bike: WHAT THE FUCK HAVE YOU DONE NOW BYAKUA YOU LITTLE SHIT-

#### Gucci Gang

Fresh Avocado: i think i just broke,,, my back,,,

Stuck in the Pantry: What? Why?

Fresh Avocado: Mondo just,,, stood on me,,,

Gremlin Boy: haha

Stuck in the Pantry: Why- Why did Mondo step on you??

Fresh Avocado: idk, something about byakuya being a little shit

Gremlin Boy: I mean,,, 👀 he has a point 👀

Fresh Avocado: i know mikan is,,, busy but can like, anybody come get me,,

Stuck in the Pantry: I’ll go get Nekomaru.

Fresh Avocado: thanks kae 

Gremlin Boy: Top 10 most famous last words

Fresh Avocado: i ain’t dead

Gremlin Boy: Top 11 most famous last words

Fly Me to The Moon: LMAO-

Fresh Avocado: how is me almost dying funny to you- 

Fly Me to The Moon: I wasn’t laughing at you, I was laughing at Kokichi’s comment.

Gremlin Boy: Wow kaito actually finds me funny-

Fly Me to The Moon: I don’t.

Gremlin Boy: :( meanie

Fly Me to The Moon: Anyways, has anyone seen Gonta?? I haven’t seen him all day.

Gremlin Boy: god fucking damn it do we have another dead person on our hands?

Stuck in the Pantry: No, Gonta would never do that! Maybe he’s still bug catching?

Fly Me to The Moon: Hmm... Maybe.

Ant-Man: Oh no! Gonta is here! :D

Stuck in the Pantry: Oh.

Ant-Man: Gonta just came back from bug catching! He went to go visit Ryoma but Ryoma wasn’t in his room?

Stuck in the Pantry: O h .

Fly Me to The Moon: who’s gonna tell him-

Ant-Man: Tell who what?

Stuck in the Pantry: NOT IT.

Gremlin Boy: NOT IT.

Fly Me to The Moon: Dang it...

Mom: I’ll do it.

Fly Me to The Moon: MOM ;’D

Gremlin Boy: YAY MOM!

Mom: Gonta.

Ant-Man: Yes?

Mom: Ryoma was sent to the nurse’s office. Something... unfortunate happened when you were out bug catching.

Ant-Man: D: Oh no!! Is Ryoma okay??

Mom: We do not know that yet. Mikan and the nurse are running tests on him currently to see if he will be okay, afterwards you may visit him.

Ant-Man: ... oh.

Mom: If it makes you feel any better, I can help you with a card for him for if we wakes up?

Ant-Man: Thanks, Tojo.

Mom: No problem. I’ll meet you in the common room in 10, Okay?

Ant-Man: Okay.

Fly Me to The Moon: How does Mom do it??

Fresh Avocado: her talent will forever be kept a secret. She even managed to calm Fuuyihiko when Peko got stabbed that one time.

Fly Me to The Moon: :0 really??? Like, the little dude with that buzz cut?

Fresh Avocado: yup

Fly Me to The Moon: Wow-

Stuck in the Pantry: Hey! Rantaro, are you okay??

Fresh Avocado: Yeah, in a stretcher. being carried by souda and nekomaru. souda is making ambulance noises.

Fly Me to The Moon: so many,, stretchers,,, and that’s what that noise is?? I genuinely thought it was an ambulance lmao

Fresh Avocado: yeah... his impressions of vehicles are... kinda scary.

Fly Me to The Moon: I mean, doesn’t he do a part time job as a mechanic?

Fresh Avocado: I think? Idk I’ll ask him

Fresh Avocado: Yeah He does.

Fly Me to The Moon: aha i was right!

RawrXD: yo 

Fresh Avocado: yo 

Fly Me to The Moon: yo 

Stuck in the Pantry: Sooo... Ryoma?

RawrXD: He’ll live but he’ll have to stay in the nurse’s office for a bit, 2 weeks at most.

Stuck in the Pantry: oh thank god- 

Fly Me to The Moon: YEEEEAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH

Fresh Avocado: Huh, we’ll be nurse office buddies.

RawrXD: Why- Why are you in the nurse’s office?

Fresh Avocado: I’m not right now but I think I broke something.

RawrXD: Why???

Fresh Avocado: Mondo stepped on me.

RawrXD: Do I wanna know why?

Fresh Avocado: Somethin about Byakuya and Ishimaru.

Stuck in the Pantry: You never said Ishimaru when you mentioned it to us?

Fresh Avocado: I was a lil dazed ok?

Stuck in the Pantry: fair enough

Fresh Avocado: ow

Stuck in the Pantry: ?

RawrXD: ?

Fresh Avocado: Souda dropped the stretcher 

Fly Me to The Moon: F

Stuck in the Pantry: F

RawrXD: F

Fresh Avocado: now Hiyoko is laughing at me

Fresh Avocado: haha I stole your hat, Succi

RawrXD: Give it baaack.

Fresh Avocado: Nah.

Fly Me to The Moon: yo, are you in the Nurse’s Office now?

Fly Me To The Moon: Rantaro?

...

Fly Me to The Moon: Guys? Anyone? What’s going on? Did Ryoma wake up?

Fresh Avocado: W H A T T H E F U C K

Fly Me to The Moon: ????? Did I say something???

Fresh Avocado: NO- I JUST SAW-

Fly Me to The Moon: SAW WHAT???

Fresh Avocado: I SAW SOMETHING I DON’T WANT TO SEE ANYMORE-

RawrXD: I just saw Mondo crying, that’s all I saw-

Fresh Avocado: YOU DO NOT WANT TO SAW WHAT I JUST SAW I FEEL SICK NGL

Fly Me to The Moon: Mondo??? Like, Mondo Oowada??? We thinking about the same Mondo because I swear, that dude lost the ability to cry when he left the womb.

Fresh Avocado: YES! AND I WILL TELL Y’ALL BUT I JUST GOTTA PROCESS IT AND OH GOD I SAW IT AGAIN AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

RawrXD: ... I saw it too-

Fresh Avocado: I KNOW BECAUSE YOU’RE RIGHT NEXT TO ME AND I CAN SEE YOUR FACE-

Fresh Avocado: [dead.inside.suichi.png]

Stuck in the Pantry: i don’t think i wanna know anymore...

Fly Me to The Moon: I want to know! I ain’t a scaredy-cat!

RawrXD: trust me, kaito. you. don’t.

Fly Me to The Moon: Okay then...?

~

It had been a couple of days since the incident. Despite the whole situation, everyone who wasn’t directly affected had to go back to classes.  
Much to everyone’s surprise, Ishimaru wasn’t seen anywhere. Kaito kept pressing Shuichi to tell him but Shuichi didn’t budge. The school after that hectic day was surprisingly quiet. Nobody knew if nobody was messing around out of respect or if they just didn’t bother because Ishimaru wasn’t there.  
The group chats were also ominously quiet. 

Days turned into weeks and still no sign of Ryoma waking up any time soon. Maybe Shuichi just told everyone that he would be okay to make them feel better but he was really... gone? Everyone was thinking it.

After the first half of the 3rd week, Gonta also stopped turning up to classes. That made the whole class descend into more chaos but it turns out he was fine, just sad. Everyone then made a note to check up on each other once in a while, even after this whole thing passed. They didn’t want a repeat of what was going on now.

After a couple of days off, Gonta finally returned. On that day, so did Ishimaru... Kind of. He was returned to the nurse’s office rather than the hospital but he was wrapped up in bandages that covered at least half of his body. He got very regular visits from his friends and even some unexpected classmates. The rift between the class and Byakuya has been torn even more and it’s gotten to the point where even Toko, who’s absolutely obsessed with him began to re-think. Even Hiyoko from another class just sticks her tongue out at him.

After the 4th week, finally something happened. It was after classes on Tuesday.

#### Gucci Gang [6:43]

Fresh Avocado: HE RISES

Garfield: hi.

Fly Me to The Moon: O H

RawrXD: .-.

Stuck in the Pantry: IkM CRYING OHE LUVES

Gremlin Boy: hdidheidneidneibdi eqjdbei he’s alive-

Garfield: you guys... actually cared?

Stuck In the Pantry: Of course we did! The entire school went out looking for you before we actually found you! But... Why? 

Garfield: i don’t know. i just felt... really down, i guess? besides gonta nobody really talked to me. i’ve also seen things that i’d rather not and done things i really regret. i just felt like there was no way out besides just... ending it. i appreciate all you’ve done for me though.

Stuck in the Pantry: Oh... We’ll make sure to appreciate you more then! I’m sorry that we forgot about your feelings, Ryoma! We’ll now learn from this situation and take care of everyone!

Garfield: thanks

Fresh Avocado: i’ve never been more scared of gonta,,,

Stuck in the Pantry: What? Why?

Fresh Avocado: he just bolted in and like, crushed ryoma,,,

Fly Me To The Moon: honestly i think that something is going on between those two...

Stuck in the Pantry: I don’t think that’s any of our business, Kaito... If there is, Ryoma and Gonta should tell us if or when they’re ready and if not, that’s fine!

Fly Me to The Moon: I’m just saying and I know, good on them if they are a thing. Just wanted to say. That’s it.

#### We Oldest but we Dumbass

The All Mighty Hall Monitor: Good morning everyone.

Fish: It’s not morning but good afternoon, Ishimaru! :D

Bike: HEIFBWIFBWUABFIE I HAD A FUCKIN HEART ATTACK HOLD UP ARE YOU ALIVE OR AM I SEEING GHOSTS??

The All Mighty Hall Monitor: I am, in fact alive, Oowada.

Fish: Wait, What? I knew that Ishimaru was off but... Why did you ask if you were seeing ghosts, Mondo?

Bike: ... Well shit.

Weed: did,,, did ishimaru,,, y’know,,,,,,,,, commit toaster bath? is that why you were crying mondo?

Baseball Dave: if so, that’s deep. sorry Ishimaru. I think for the people that swear, we should all stop for like, a week and whoever accidentally does it, someone can step on their toe. That also goes with any other rule breaking.

Weed: who are you and what have you done with Leon- but yea

Bike: I’ll try my best for you bro <3

The All Mighty Hall Monitor: <3

Weed: what

Baseball Dave: what

Egg: ,,, i leave for just a couple of minutes and this happens-

The All Mighty Hall Monitor: But I have a question... Why is Amami also in the Nurse’s Office?

Bike: ... Shoot.

The All Mighty Hall Monitor: What did you do, Oowada?

Bike: I... I may have stepped on him...?

The All Mighty Hall Monitor: you did what

Bike: HE WAS LYING ON THE FLOOR FOR SOME REASON AND I WAS WORRIED ABOUT YOU SO I ACCIDENTALLY STOOD ON HIM- I DIDN’T SEE HIM-

All Mighty Hall Monitor: YOU BROKE HIS ARM AND HIS RIB-

Bike: i did what now

All Mighty Hall Monitor: You stood on him which made him break his arm and his rib.

Bike: Dang it. I’ll go apologise to him.

All Mighty Hall Monitor: Good.

Bike: Sorry bro

All Mighty Hall Monitor: It’s okay, bro.

Bike: <3

All Mighty Hall Monitor: <3

Baseball Dave: again what

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> special thanks to my friend who thought i overdosed on sleeping pills because i was asking stuff about sleeping pills for this chapter.  
> thanks for being concerned because nobody else was lmao
> 
> man i love my friends ignoring me hah
> 
> byakua is a bitch


	3. Oh God, Oh Fu-

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Souda makes the mistake of posting a picture to the wrong group chat. Everyone goes feral.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW FOR PHYSICAL ABUSE  
> and Rantaro, Ryoma and Ishimaru are still in the Nurse’s Office and will be until the end of this chapter :)  
> chatfic time again lmao
> 
> !Nicknames!
> 
> Ultimate Himbo - Souda  
> Gun Ham - Gundham  
> Orange Juice - Hajime  
> Hope Bagel - Nagito  
> Gamer Girl - Chiaki  
> ALL WOMEN ARE QUEENS - Sonia  
> Horny People Don’t have Rights - Teruteru  
> 2000’s Energy - Ibuki  
> Boss Baby - Fuuyihiko  
> STRONK - Nekomaru

#### The Middle Child [3:03AM]

Ultimate Himbo: [i.love.him.jpeg]

Ultimate Himbo: WAIT- SHIT- WRONG GROUP CHAT SHEIFBEIDNEJDBRUFB HOW DO I DELETE THINGS

Orange Juice: is,,,,, is that,,,,,,,,,,,, who i think it is?

Ultimate Himbo: UH NO- I HAVE NO IDEA WHAT YOU’RE TALKING ABOUT HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

Gamer Girl: it’s gundham. 

Ultimate Himbo: F U C K

Orange Juice: ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,why i thought you like,,,,, hated him.

Ultimate Himbo: Yeah well uhhhhhhh, that changed.

Orange Juice: I can see that.

Gamer Girl: how?

Ultimate Himbo: well uh- I was playing Mario Kart with the bois and then Gundham just knocked on my dorm room and I actually forgot why but somehow I invited him in and then he joined in with Mario Kart and things,,,,, escalated??

Gamer Girl: ,,,, What do you mean by,,,,, escalated? 

Ultimate Himbo: uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh y’know- 😳

Orange Juice: oh my god i did not need to know that jfc 

Gamer Girl: ,,, oh

Ultimate Himbo: ngl now that everything’s worn off I’m lowkey terrified 

Orange Juice: ?

Ultimate Himbo: my dad-

Gamer Girl: .-. 

Orange Juice: What about your dad?

Gamer Girl: hajime,,,,,,,, shut up

Ultimate Himbo: he’s extremely homophobic and i’m scared as ffuuuuuuucccckkkkkk now

Orange Juice: Oh sh-

Ultimate Himbo: like, really fuckin scared, like as scared as teruteru that one time he hit on ishimaru scared-

Orange Juice: Oh damn- should I be calling the police or something-

Ultimate Himbo: pls don’t-

2000’s energy: ,,,,, What the fuck did Ibuki just walk in on

#### DM to Chiaki Nanami

Hajimeme: call the fucking police- I am actually kinda scared for Souda ngl

Gaymer Gorl: already on it.

#### Gucci Gang [3:35]

Fly me to The Moon: WHY THE FUCK IS THERE POLICE SIRENS 

Gremlin Boy: THEY’VE COME FOR RYOMA HIDE

Garfield: wow thanks 

Gremlin Boy: shdiendinekde i was joking

RawrXD: ,,,,,,,,,, why are they going into souda’s dorm?

Gremlin Boy: AND WHY THE FUCK IS THAT EMO SATANIST KID THERE TOO???

Fly Me to The Moon: Oh fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu

RawrXD: What do you know, Kaito-

Fly me to The Moon: OH FFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU OH NO OH NO HIDE GUYS Y’ALL SERIOUSLY HIDE I’M NOT JOKING OH GOD OH FU-

RawrXD: What why-

Gremlin Boy: is that souda’s dad-

Fly Me to The Moon: JESUS FUCKING CHRIST WHO CALLED THE POLICE ISTG I THOUGHT IT WAS JUST ME AND HAGAKURE WHO KNEW OH DAMM

RawrXD: Knew What?

Fly Me to The Moon: I don’t know if I should be telling y’all but- Uh- Souda kinda- gets beat up by his dad sometimes- Uh- I heard it a couple of times over Mario Kart uhhhhhhhhhh-

RawrXD: ........

Fresh Avocado: Why the fuck are y’all still up-

Fresh Avocado: O H

Stuck In The Pantry: What do you mean by ‘Oh’, Rantaro?

Fresh Avocado: I just- scrolled up- and errrmmmm...

Stuck in the Pantry: .-. oh. now i see what you mean.

Fresh Avocado: yyyyyyeeeeeaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhh

Gremlin Boy: Yeah but I’ve got some new information that isn’t like, a major thing but it’s tea-

Stuck in the Pantry: I don’t think this is the right time-

Gremlin Boy: I went to go crawling in the vents so I could get the tea on this situation, I heard Souda’s dad yelling at Souda, Gundham yelling at Souda’s dad, y’know- But I found out the reason why Gundham was in Souda’s dorm.

Fresh Avocado: Okay...?

Gremlin Boy: They slept together.

Fly me to The Moon: so my mario kart buddy,,,,,,, was really fucking someone,,,,, god,,,,,,, i thought they were just kissing oh,,,,,,

Gremlin Boy: Honestly, I’d feel bad for you but... You called me unfunny a couple of days ago so :P I don’t.

Gremlin Boy: and that’s the tea sis! The only thing that confuses me is I thought that Souda liked Sonia? Like,,, a lot. Oh well.

#### We Oldest But we Dumbass [9:37]

Bike: why the heck was there police sirens in the middle of the night???

Weed: I know the information but because of the bro code I must not tell anybody.

Baseball Dave: All I saw was Souda and Gundham yelling as some old man then I went back to bed because it was too hecking early.

Fish: Wait... Gundam and Souda?? Don’t they like hate each other though?

Baseball Dave: The must’ve combined forces to yell at that old man, I guess.

Weed: Ok, heck it, I give up on the bro code because it’s actually kinda illegal but that man was Souda’s dad and the reason he was yelling at Souda and Gundham was because he somehow found out that the two slept together, which at hate that I heard at least a quarter of but the reason why Souda’s dad was yelling and Gundham and Souda was because Souda’s dad is really really REALLY homophobic and he also kinda beat Souda when they lived in the same house so like,,,, it was kinda wild.

Bike: waitwhat 

Weed: To summarise, Souda and Gundham slept together and now Souda’s dad is angry but he’s now under a restraining order so he won’t be able to bother Souda or Gundam for like, many many years unless they both decide to lift it.

Bike: w h a t

__

Baseball Dave has left the chat

_****_

_****_

_  
****  
  
_

#### The Middle Child [10:32AM]

Hope Bagel: hhhuuuuhhh, I ggueesss that expplaaaainnns the pooolllliice siiirreeennnsss,,,

ALL WOMEN ARE QUEENS: Police Sirens?? What??

Gamer Girl: You don’t want to know.

Orange Juice: I can confirm... You don’t want to know.

Boss Baby: I’m sorry but you’re all idiots for thinking that Kazuichi was actually 100% straight.

ALL WOMEN ARE QUEENS: ???????

2000’s Energy: Ibuki hates to break it to you but...

Boss Baby: I’ll do it.

Boss Baby: Your boyfriend fucked Kazuichi.

ALL WOMEN ARE QUEENS: I don’t have a boyfriend???????

Boss Baby: You- You aren’t dating Gundam?

ALL WOMEN ARE QUEENS: Erm????? No???? 

Boss Baby: oops

Himbo: What,,,, What the fuck guys-

2000’s Energy: ABORT ABORT ABANDON SHIP SCATTER RUN EVERYONE FOR THEMSELVES!!!!!!! WE’VE BEEN SPOTTED!!!!!!!!!!

_**2000’s Energy left the chat** _

STRONK: WHAT ARE YOU GUYS TALKING ABOUT???

STRONK: OH.

Gamer Girl: This is sad, Monokuma play despacito.

Orange Juice: ...what

Gamer Girl: You disappoint me.

Orange Juice: :(

Gamer Girl: ok not too much but you still disappoint me a little bit.

Orange Juice: that’s.... better? I think?

Himbo: i’d appreciate if y’all wouldn’t talk about my romantic life because now everyone at school knows somehow-

Gamer Girl: I’m guessing it was probably either Kaito or Hagakure who let it slip. Hagakure probably said it himself and then realised that he messed up and with the Kaito theory Kaito said it to someone but Kokichi overheard and then he was the one to spread it. those are just theories tho...

Orange Juice: honestly, i bet it was Hagakure.

Boss Baby: Hagakure 

ALL WOMEN ARE QUEENS: Hagakure

Himbo: orrrrrrrrrr they just came out to see what the police were doing and heard the argument with me and my dad and it wasn’t one of my mariokart bros?

Gamer Girl: Or that. Or maybe it was them all?

Orange Juice: Doubt it

Boss Baby: Doubt it

ALL WOMEN ARE QUEENS: I doubt it!!!

Gamer Girl: wow thanks guys

Himbo: I just want to know one thing though, who was it who actually called the police? I’m not mad, I’m actually sorta thankful???

Orange Juice: I suggested it but Chiaki was already on the phone so it was Chiaki.

Himbo: Well,,, Uh Thank you Chiaki!

Gamer Girl: no problem! i’ve heard about other student’s similar problems and i just felt like i should do something for once.

Himbo: hold up,,, other students???

Gamer Girl: oh yeah, Ishimaru went through physical and emotional abuse and from his biological dad before he was welcomed into his foster family, all of the kindergarten kids went through some sort of trauma, mikan went through some trauma thanks to hiyoko and so did miu i think? might’ve been just one of her jokes though...

Himbo: .-. the kindergarteners???? like the tiny kids??? I forgot their names but one of them acts and looks like that baseball kid from the year above?

Gamer Girl: aye

Himbo: Oh sh-

Himbo: All of them??

Gamer Girl: Well not ALL the kindergarteners but the one that looks like Leon, the one that goes into a panic attack whenever anyone says gentle, the one that looks way too tired and the one that constantly wears a mask. Also the girl in the wheelchair isn’t actually completely disabled.

Himbo: Oh right those kids, also what??? The one with the green hair?

Gamer Girl: yeah, me, nagito and hajime saw her fall out of the wheelchair and she got up on both legs and pulled the wheelchair back up. So she might be disabled but I highly doubt it... I understand some people can stand for a little while but then their legs stop working for a bit but she just seems... off altogether.

ALL WOMEN ARE QUEENS: Maybe it’s a Gypsy Rose situation?

Himbo: a what now situation?

ALL WOMEN ARE QUEENS: Gypsy Rose was a girl who was given medication that she didn’t need to be kept ill by her mother! Her mother lied about all her conditions and eventually Gypsy killed her mother with a boy she knew, but that’s just a simplified version.

Himbo: What,,, What the fuck???

ALL WOMEN ARE QUEENS: Yes! What the fuck indeed! It’s a very unfortunate story... In my opinion she didn’t really deserve to be put in jail because she only killed her mother because well... You can probably guess.

Himbo: Usually I don’t condone murder but... Obviously that girl is troubled and wouldn’t that technically count as self defence? I doubt anyone would like to be given medication they don’t need.

ALL WOMEN ARE QUEENS: You’d think that but... Sometimes the court can be a bit silly, in my opinion.

2000’s Energy: Why does Ibuki keep dropping in at the weirdest conversations...

Himbo: mood

Boss Baby: ......... does anybody actually know what happened to Ishimaru? Like, half of his face and every inch of skin is covered in bandages...

Himbo: idk dude, ask Mondo?

Boss Baby: I did that yesterday and he just started to cry?

Himbo: MONDO??? CRYING??? Did I read that right??

Boss Baby: uh yeah

Himbo: Huh, must’ve been one bad accident whatever happened.

2000’s Energy: Oh! Ibuki doesn’t know really what happened but it wasn’t an accident! 

Himbo: ??????? Then what did happen???

2000’s Energy: From What Ibuki heard, it had something to do with Byakuya! Not our Byakuya, the asshole one.

Himbo: did... did byakuya beat up ishimaru-

Boss Baby: Doubt it, Mondo would’ve beaten up Byakuya first.

Himbo: Hmm, true... He also probably would’ve said something about ‘wasting his time’ too.

Himbo: I’ll go ask Hagakure hold up-

#### DM to mario kart #2

Mario Kart #3: yo uh what happened to Ishimaru-

Mario Kart #2: oh you don’t know?

Mario Kart #3: uhhhh no?

Mario Kart #2: He attempted committed to commit toaster bath, dude

Mario Kart #3: holy fucking shit- you being serious???

Mario Kart #2: yeah

#### The Middle Child

Himbo: uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

Boss Baby: ?

Himbo: Hagakure said he uhhhhh,,,, committed toaster bath. Y’know, commit not alive?

2000’s Energetic: What the fuck!!!!!

Himbo: mood

Boss Baby: i think i died inside a bit ngl 

Boss Baby: like, he’s annoying as fuck but.... like. He’s just.... there and if he actually died, I think everyone would die inside too

Himbo: ok who are you and what have you done with Fuuyihiko-

Boss Baby: Fair enough.

Himbo: YOU DIDN’T ANSWER MY QUESTION-

Gamer Girl: Your questions will never be answered because god doesn’t have the answers.

Himbo: did angie steal your phone or smth-

Gamer Girl: no. god can’t answer your questions because he doesn’t exist.

Himbo: but,,, gundham exists

Gamer Girl: he’s a kinnie of hades he doesn’t count

Himbo: :( i wanted to be a god too but eh i still love him-

Gamer Girl: of course you do

Himbo: What’s that supposed to mean??

Gamer Girl: nothing-

Boss Baby: god doesn’t exist because i killed him

Orange Juice: Jesus Christ.

Gamer Girl: hahahahaha 

Orange Juice: oh. I didn’t actually realise what I did there.

Orange Juice: but seriously can y’all stfu I’m trying to focus on homework.

Himbo: :( why hajimeme 

Orange Juice: don’t you dare fucking call me that.

2000’s Energy: Yeah! He gets called that way too much in other chatfics!

Orange Juice: ?...

Himbo: IBUKI STOP BREAKING THE 4TH WALL-

2000’s Energy: Oops! Just forget Ibuki said anything!

Orange Juice: Okay...?

#### Gucci Gang

Gremlin Boy: So Taka said that I can’t wear my Lord Farquad costume to the water park in 2 weeks... Respect the drip, Taka.

RawrXD: stop talking. forever. 

Jesus Christ: ATUA TAKES AWAY KOKICHI’S SPEAKING PRIVILEGES.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> also headcannon time:
> 
> souda isn’t a musical theatre kid (he leaves that to Tsumugi, Kaede and Kork) but he knows every single starkid song.
> 
> let it out? he belts it out at 3:00AM
> 
> cup of roasted coffee/poisoned coffee? will not hesitate to sing it out loud whenever he either sees coffe or drinks it.
> 
> I don’t want to do the work today? He will just do a verse whenever taka walks up to him (or when he has to do work he doesn’t want to do)
> 
> You could also probably hear him screaming duck is lord from the farm.
> 
> His yearbook quote would probably be ‘ISHIMARU CAN’T DRAW, ISHIMARU CAN’T DRAW’
> 
> And last thing about this headcannon, he knows the entire choreography of Show Stoppin’ Number/Working Boys off by heart and just sometimes does the jumps down the hallway. He’s also convinced to teach Mondo the choreography too.
> 
> Also up next is waterpark shenanigans because wHY NOT-  
> TIME FOR 👏🏻GOOD👏🏻OL’👏🏻PINING👏🏻GUYS👏🏻
> 
> GO GET YOUR TISSUES AND A PILLOW TO SCREAM IN BECAUSE THESE IDIOTS ARE IN LOVE-  
> IT’S MOSTLY GONNA BE GOSHI AND ISHIMONDO BUT THE OTHER SHIPS WILL HAVE THEIR SPOTLIGHT EVENTUALLY-
> 
> also soudam is now cannon in here so y’all will deal with them being himbo boyfriends from now on dhwkcneidnwid 
> 
> I also take ship suggestions but only ships that don’t include any characters that are already planned for a relationship (example would be like, no Gonta ships because I got Goshi and no Shuichi ships because we got Oumsai)


	4. it’s a mental breakdown...

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Junko decides to ruin (almost) everyone’s day at the waterpark.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> pINING TIME Y’ALL AHA-
> 
> also Chihiro exists now because he’s a character I like so  
> also also kirumi is best mom 2020  
> pls don’t bring up the gender discourse sndiwndiendm i just prefer sticking to canon-
> 
> i don’t know why i can only write angst lmao
> 
> And the relationships set up in this chapter will most likely be the ones I focus on the most but don’t worry! The others will get their spotlight soon <3

On the way to the way to the Water Park was... interesting. It was very loud but the atmosphere was different. On the first bus everyone was actually quieter than they’d normally be. The only time that the noise got a little too much was whenever Byakuya tried to speak which was met with a bunch of teenagers screaming and yelling at him to shut up. Nobody had forgiven him after what he said to the beloved Hall Monitor. 

In the second bus everyone silently agreed to tease Souda and Gundam. They both knew it was with good intentions but that didn’t make it less annoying. The two eventually just fell asleep, which just lead to more teasing. The class finally stopped when Teruteru said something a little too explicit because of course he did.

But out of the 3 buses... The third was the worst. Everyone was screaming over each other for whatever reason. Miu was screaming something at Kokichi who was screaming something at Shuichi who probably had a headache. Tsumugi was probably yelling some anime or musical theatre references and Keebo put on his noise cancelling headphones because it was ridiculously loud.

The screaming just got worse as they neared the Water Park but thankfully when everyone got out of the buses, the noise went down... somewhat. Ishimaru went over all of the rules and then everyone was let go to do whatever they wanted, just nothing illegal (obviously.)

The majority of the people went to the dressing rooms while a couple of other people (mostly the injured students) went to go find some seats for everyone.

Rantaro and Ishimaru are the only students who weren’t allowed to go on any extreme rollercoaster thanks to their injuries. They were still allowed to go on less extreme ones and in the pools but just nothing that could hurt them again. Kirumi just decided to watch over all of the students in case any of them did anything stupid seeing as Ishimaru was out of commission for a while. 

Chihiro stood outside the changing rooms, debating which one to go in. He still hasn’t told anyone about his ‘secret’. He couldn’t stand the thought of getting bullied... again. He was still debating as people left the changing rooms, talking about which rides they were going to first. He decided to go talk to someone who he could trust and he knew he wouldn’t be judged by.

He walked up to where Kirumi, Rantaro and Ishimaru were sitting. Mondo was sitting next to Ishimaru talking to him.

“H-Hey uhm... Kirumi?” 

Kirumi turned around to face the young programmer.

“Yes, Chihiro?”

“I n-need your advice on s-something...”

Kirumi raised a brow, silently telling the boy (even though everyone thought he was a girl) to go on.

“U-Uhm well...” He began, trying to find the right words.

It took a few minutes before he whispered his problem to Kirumi.

Kirumi blinked, mildly surprised but she didn’t say anything. She was thinking. Finally she came up with a plan and she whispered it back to Chihiro.

Chihiro nodded.

“Thank you, Kirumi!” He said, smiling.

“No problem, Chihiro.” She replied, sitting back down.

Mondo raised a brow.

“What was that about?” Mondo asked.

“She just needed help on deciding which ride to go on first.”

…

“A-And what a-are y-you idiots d-doing?” Toko Asked, eyebrow raised.

“We’re playing Water Polo but we’re on each other’s shoulders.” Leon explained.

“T-That sounds d-dumb.”

“You haven’t played it though! You can’t say it’s dumb if you haven’t even given it a chance!” Leon said, defensively.

“He does have a point, bookworm!” Junko yelled who was attempting to drown Kokichi.

Hagakure looked up and yelled.

“WAY-HEY! JUNKO DON’T DROWN KOKICHI. I KNOW HE’S ANNOYING BUT THINK OF THE CONSEQUENCES.” 

Junko groaned and let go of Kokichi who rises from the water, spluttering and coughing.

“WHAT THE HELL?!” He yelled before he got out of the pool, probably to tell Kirumi or someone else.

Junko rolled her eyes and also got out of the pool, presumably to cause havoc somewhere else. It took a couple of minutes of wandering before she finally found something. 

_Why is Chihiro going into the Men’s changing room?_

Even Junko felt disgusted. She thought that Chihiro wasn’t weird like that but turns out she was... Time to call her out.

Junko followed Chihiro into the changing rooms ready to cause drama but what she was met with she definitely wasn’t ready for.

“Wow, Chihiro I didn’t think you were a pervert but-“ She cut herself off, blinking.

Chihiro was shirtless but... There wasn’t anything there.

Chihiro squeaked.

“I- Wha- What are you doing in here?!” She or well... He yelled.

“And what are you doing in here?! You’re a chick, aren’t ya?!”

“I- Well- It’s a long story, okay?! Please just get out!”

“Are you trans or something?”

“N-No! I’m a guy! I just pretend to be a girl so I don’t get bullied!” Chihiro yelled, before he very much regretted letting the words spill..

He knew that face that Junko was making... She was going to tell everyone.

Chihiro practically begged Junko not to tell anyone but she didn’t listen. She just silently walked out, ready to cause some chaos.

Chihiro just stayed in the changing room, crying. He couldn’t show his face again... Now that everyone is going to know something he swore to keep to himself and only himself. He only made an exception for Kirumi because he trusted her. He thought he would be able to enjoy this trip but turns out fate had other plans for him.

Junko decided to tell Chihiro’s buddies first. They deserve to know that they’d been deceived.

“What’s up, assholes!” She greeted.

“Please refrain from using that language, Enoshima.” Ishimaru said, a little disgusted.

“Yeah yeah, whatever... Anyways I’ve got something to tell you guys and you aren’t going to believe it, trust me.”

Ishimaru and Mondo raised a brow. Rantaro knew this probably didn’t include him but he couldn’t say he wasn’t interested in what the girl had to say. Kirumi tried to block out what Junko was about to say because it was most likely going to be inappropriate.

“Anyways... I saw Chihiro go into the Men’s changing room and I went to go investigate because like, that’s not right and turns out the chick is actually a dude. He told me himself.” Junko said, grinning.

Kirumi’s eyes widened. _Oh no..._

Ishimaru had a hand over his mouth and Mondo was staring at the ground while Rantaro just looked away, trying to forget what he just heard.

“Haha! You’re faces are priceless! Now if you excuse me, I gotta tell the others. Bye~” She said, strutting away.

The next victims of Chihiro’s secret were Leon, Toko, Sayaka, Makoto and Kyoko.

“‘Sup bitches!” Everyone grimaced when they heard that annoying shrill voice.

“Didn’t Hagakure tell ya to fuck off?” Leon Asked, eyebrow raised.

Sayaka gasped.

“Junko! Leon! Remember the rule! No swearing for the week.”

“Oh right, sorry...” Leon Said, rubbing his neck.

Junko rolled her eyes.

“Yeah, Yeah, whatever but I’ve got something better to say than your stupid game.”

Everyone raised a brow.

“Did you guys know that Chihiro was actually a dude? So basically, I saw her or well... Him go into the men’s changing room and I decided to investigate because that’s not cool and turns out she is actually a dude.” She said, smirking.

“You actually thought that she or well... whatever was a girl? He didn’t really fool anyone.” Toko said, arms crossed.

Makoto and Kyoko nodded in agreement with Toko.

“It was a little obvious.” Makoto said.

“I kinda just figured out...” Sayaka said.

“Wait, we were supposed to think that Chihiro was a girl? I just thought that she or well he liked she/her pronouns.” Leon Said, legitimately confused.

Junko groaned.

“You guys are so boring! I thought you’d be more surprised!” She said.

“I also don’t think that you should be spreading classmate’s secrets too... I think he would’ve told us when he was ready.” Makoto added.

“Well whatever! I already told Rule Boy, Biker Bitch, That Taka wannabe and Avocado man!” Junko said.

Hagakure stood next to Junko, head tilted.

“Told them what?”

“Don’t-“ Makoto started but there was no point...

“Chihiro is a boy.” Junko said.

Hagakure blinked.

“Huh. Alright. What am I supposed to do with this information?”

“Like... Go bother him or something. Get right up in his grill or something.”

“First of all, I’d never do that to anybody even if they killed someone unless it’s you or Byakuya and second of all, nobody says ‘get right up in his/her/their grill’ anymore. We only allow Ishimaru to say it because he’s well... Ishimaru. He’s like, a grandpa but it that funny way.”

Junko rolled her eyes.

“You guys are no fun...” She said before she went to go find other people to terrorise.

After Junko was out of sight Makoto finally spoke up.

“Should we go try find Chihiro? We don’t want another Ishimaru situation.”

Everyone nodded.

“Me and Leon can go search the Men’s changing room, I doubt he’ll be there but Sayaka and Toko, can you search the Women’s changing room and Kyoko and Yasuhiro could you get some more people to look around the park? If anyone finds him, put it on the group chat, okay?” Makoto Said.

Everyone nodded and set out.

It took a while but they found him unharmed... Sorta. He just stayed in the Men’s changing room and he didn’t move an inch.

#### We Oldest But we Dumbass

Egg: We found him! The panic is over!

Makoto quickly put his phone away so he could comfort his classmate.

Chihiro’s face was very much tear stained and red. Anyone could tell he was crying... a lot.

Makoto sat on the left side of Chihiro while Leon sat on the right.

“Hey, bud. It’s alright.” Leon said, trying his best to comfort the small boy.

“I-Is it t-t-though? What i-if everyone h-h-hates me! I lied t-to them!” Chihiro sniffled.

“Nobody hates you and if anyone does, they’re idiots. I’m sure everyone will understand, Chihiro and if they don’t, I can beat some sense into them. But... Why did you pretend to be a girl, if you don’t mind me asking? You don’t have to say if you don’t want to, just curious.” Leon replied.

“W-Well... I-I wa-was bullied a-as a kid f-for being w-w-weak so I-I... I-I just... L-Looking b-back on i-i-it was a dumb decision but... T-The bullying d-did eventually get t-to me so m-much that e-every ounce of s-self confidence I h-had just... vanished. M-My self esteem went d-downhill and I-I just decided to... Dress l-like a girl because I w-was as w-weak as one, apparently... I-I know g-girls can b-be strong because look at Sakura b-but... I-I was just a kid and I-I didn’t know that.” Chihiro explained.

“Wait... Hold up. How long has this been going on?” Leon asked.

“S-Since I was 11...”

“Oh. Oh wow... That’s a long time but that sucks! Who cares if you’re not strong?! You can be strong in different ways! Like emotionally strong! Those kids were stupid as hell for bullying you! Being strong doesn’t mean that you can’t be a man! I’m really sorry that you had to experience that, dude... Junko is just a... bad... person for sharing that because it’s clearly got you this upset. If you want, we can forget about this or maybe you want to start dressing like a dude again? It’s totally up to you.” 

“... I m-mean... Everyone k-knows I’m a Male now so... I-I guess I might as well act like one?” Chihiro said, a little less upset.

“If that’s what ya want then go for it! Be whatever you want to be and remember, it doesn’t matter what other people think. The only thing that matters is how you feel about yourself, not some stupid bullies. You express yourself how you want to.” 

Chihiro looked at Leon.

“That’s... probably the n-nicest thing anyone besides my d-dad has said t-to me.” Chihiro said, smiling very slightly.

Leon ruffled Chihiro’s hair.

“And I’ll tell you that whenever you feel like this, alright? Now, you ready to plunge down a huge water slide?!” Leon Asked, excitedly.

Chihiro nodded.

“Y-Yeah!” He said, getting up.

The pair then ran out of the changing rooms, yelling.

Makoto blinked, very surprised.

Who knew that Leon could be such a good friend?? That might sound mean but Makoto expected stuff like that from Hagakure, Aoi, Sayaka and his sister... Leon would be low on his list to expect inspirational speeches from. Well... Maybe not as low as Celeste, Mukuro and Byakuya but... Still low.

…

#### Gucci Gang

Ant-Man: Gonta has a question!

Mom: Go ahead, Gonta.

Ant-Man: What do ‘couples’ do?

Gremlin Boy: 👀 Did bug boy finally find a certain someone?? About damn time! I was starting to get bored!

Ant-Man: Oh no, Gonta hasn’t yet well... Gonta has but he hasn’t told him yet but I saw Toko from the other class and another woman do things that seemed rather romantic to Gonta so he wanted to make sure!

Gremlin Boy: Hold up... You like someone, Gonta??

Ant-Man: Oh Yes! Gonta does!

Gremlin Boy: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) Care to share?

Ant-Man: Oh uhm... The person that Gonta likes is on this group chat so Gonta would rather say it in person or via a private message than here...

Gremlin Boy: 👀

#### DM to Aquaman

Gay Gremlin: Yo, I normally wouldn’t slide into your DM’s any day but... this is sorta urgent. look at the group chat.

Aquaman: why 

Gay Gremlin: Turns out Gonta likes someone and you’re the only person he actually hangs out with sooooo... I have a tiny incy weeny suspicion that it might you. just sayin :P

Aquaman: ... kokichi you fucking-

Gay Gremlin: ?

Aquaman: i’m right next to gonta and now he’s convinced i’m sunburnt you little shit-

Gay Gremlin: Nishishi~

Aquaman: that’s cursed.

Gay Gremlin: Honestly, my entire existence is cursed!

Aquaman: you can say that again

Gay Gremlin: Now stop being an antisocial and hang out with your future husband or smth :P

Aquaman: fuck you

#### Gucci Gang

Stuck in the Pantry: Is everyone having a good time?

Gremlin Boy: I guess :/

RawrXD: kokichi you just pushed me into a wall and kissed me what the fuck 

Stuck in the Pantry: kOKICHI DID WHAT-

Gremlin Boy: 🤷♂️ impulse lmao

Garfield: ... ok what the fuck so you make fun of me but then you do whatever the fuck that was-

Gremlin Boy: I did not make fun of you! I was just stating facts

Garfield: ok fair enough but seriously what the fuck-

Stuck in the Pantry: REMEMBER THE NO SWEARING RULE, RYOMA >:(

Garfield: shoot sorry-

Stuck in the Pantry: It’s okay, just don’t do it again!

Fly Me to the Moon: whipped-

Gremlin Boy: Nah, He’s whipped for Gonta 👀

Garfield: kokichi you better start running because i swear to god-

Gremlin Boy: I’m in a waiting line with Shuichi and Keebo so :P you aren’t getting me this time, short stuff

Garfield: look behind you.

Gremlin Boy: Oh sh

Fly me to The Moon: Oh ryoma killed him-

Stuck on the Pantry: NO KILLING ANYONE, THANKS- SHUCHI, KEEBO HAS RYOMA KILLED KOKICHI?

RawrXD: Unfortunately not, Gonta is currently hugging Ryoma so he doesn’t launch at Kokichi.

Stuck in the Pantry: Good.

Gremlin Boy: aaaaaAAAAAAAAAAAA??????????

RawrXD: ... what 

The Brave Little Toaster: I never actually thought he would actually confess. Huh.

Stuck in the Pantry: Do I even want to know what happened?

Gremlin Boy: TOO LATE I’M ALREADY TELLING YOU-

Garfield: if you tell anyone i’m going to launch you into the sun

Gremlin Boy: Hah you don’t scare me SO ANYWA

RawrXD: OH SHIT HE KNOCKED KOKICHI OUT-

Stuck in the Pantry: WHAT-

RawrXD: RYOMA JUST KNOCKED KOKICHI OUT??? WHAT DO I DO???

Stuck In The Pantry: Go take Kokichi to Kirumi and the others... I’ll go talk to Ryoma...

#### The Middle Child

Orange Juice: why is Kokichi knocked out-

Gamer Girl: My guess is probably he was annoying someone, saying something he wasn’t supposed to, Mondo or all the above.

Orange Juice: Those are all possible theories, tbh.

Himbo: I actually know what went down because me and Gundam were getting ice-cream and walked past and Kokichi was a little snitch with my situation, so I’m going to be a snitch to him. So basically, Gonta, Ryoma, Kokichi, Keebo and Shuichi got off a ride and Ryoma apparently confessed his feelings for Gonta because he thought he was going to die(??) and everyone heard it, very clearly and Kokichi was teasing Ryoma and then Ryoma just like.... punched him square in the face. His nose bled a bit too and it was pretty interesting. Everyone was screaming. It was pretty funny looking at it honestly.

Orange Juice: 😳

Himbo: GUYS HAJIMEME USED AN EMOJI THIS IS NOT A DRILL, THIS IS NOT A DRILL-

Orange Juice: oh fuck you.

Himbo: Nah, Gundam does that :P

Orange Juice: E W I DID NOT NEED TO KNOW THAT, JEEZ-

Gamer Girl: horny people don’t have rights horny people don’t have rights horny people don’t have rights

2000’s Energy: EW!!!

Himbo: :( this is bullying 

Orange Juice: WE WOULDN’T BE BULLYING YOU IF YOU DIDN’T SAY WHAT YOU SAID, KAZUICHI 

Himbo: wow I’m back to second name basis I’m sad, hajimeme

Orange Juice: AND DON’T CALL ME THAT-

Gamer Girl: only me and nagihoe can call him that so back off sODA

Himbo: n...nagihoe?

Gamer Girl: fuck hajimeme we’ve been spotted let’s roll out

Orange Juice: Yep see y’all 

Himbo: HAJIME SAID Y’ALL??? OH MY GOD??

2000’s Energy: Who wants to bet that Hajime, Chiaki and Nagito are all going to confess their feelings on this trip-

Himbo: wait they haven’t already?

2000’s Energy: good point, good point. I bet $30 that they already have.

Himbo: I bet $60 that they already have

STRONK: I BET $70 THAT THEY HAVEN’T 

Hope Bagel: iiii haaaavvveee nnnoooo idddeeeaaaa what weeee’re beeetttiiinnng on buuuuttt,,, I beeet $400 

Himbo: for which side?

Himbo: OH FUCK SHIT WE’VE BEEN SPOTTED OOPS SCATTER!

Hope Bagel: hhuuuuuhhhhhhh,,,,,?

2000’s Energy: EVERYONE RUN HAJIMEME AND GAMER GIRL WILL BE BACK ANY MOMENT AAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Orange Juice: why are you all leaving?

Gamer Girl: [why.are.you.running??why.are.running??.png]

Hope Bagel: I loooookkeeed uuppp and they weerreeee betting onnn if wweee were alll daaaatinng or not,,,

Orange Juice: Oh. Well Nekomaru you owe Ibuki and Kazuichi $70

STRONK: DANG IT

2000’s Energy: YAY I GUESS BUT PLS NEKOMARU WE DON’T NEED YOUR MONEY IT WAS JUST A JOKE PLS KEEP IT ;-;

Hope Bagel: iiii ccooouuullldddd ggiiiivveee them tthhheee monnney?

2000’s Energy: no nagito seriously it’s fine don’t worry wjxkwnd

Hope Bagel: no seerrriiously, I rreeeaally haaave waaay to muuuch and i haaaavvee no idea wwhaaat to sppeenndd it on so,,,

2000’s Energy: HOW?? HOW MUCH DO YOU EVEN HAVE???

Hope Bagel: myyy paareeeents werreee praaccticaally miiillionarrees but ssiiincee they diiieed, they gave it ttooo me,,, i’ve ggoooottt $6,000,0000 I tthiiiinmmk,,,

2000’s Energy: WHAT THE FUUUUCK??? THAT’S RICHER THAN BYAKAUYA WHAT

Himbo: How,,, how can someone be richer than byakuya that’s like,,,, impossible,,,,

Hope Bagel: 🤷♂️ idddkkk duuuuudddeee,,

Himbo: Oh hey, Kokichi is up-

#### Gucci Gang

Gremlin Boy: ryoma you fukin asshole-

Ant-Man: >:( Ryoma is not an asshole!

Gremlin Boy: he just knocked me out tho 

Garfield: yeah because you were about to tell everyone in this group chat about something that really didn’t affect you so :/ 

Gremlin Boy: well idk i’m still going to tell them :P

Garfield: you wouldn’t dare.

Gremlin Boy: Oh Yes I would~

Gremlin Boy: RYOMA IS DATING GONTA NOW SO HAVE FUN WITH THAT INFORMATION Y’ALL

Garfield: KOKICHI YOU FUCKIN-

Jesus Christ: Oh! Atua already knew because they’re all knowing so of course Angie knew!

Fly me to The Moon: Wait... They weren’t already???

Stuck in the Pantry: Oh!! Congrats you two! :D

RawrXD: Congratulations!

Mom: Congratulations you two. :)

Stuck in the Pantry: OMG MOM USED AN EMOTICON YOU’VE GOT HER BLESSING WELL DONE-

Avocado Man: 👌🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👌🏻👌🏻👌🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👌🏻👌🏻👌🏻👌🏻👌🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻👏🏻 🏳️🌈

Garfield: That.... actually went better than I expected-

Ant-Man: ;-; Gonta is actually crying from happiness right now!! Thank you all! Gonta will give all of his love to Ryoma!

Ant-Man: @Garfield 💕💕💕💘💘💘💖💖💖💖💗💗💗💓💓💓💓💞💞💞💝💝💝💝❤️🧡💚💙🧡💚💜❤️💛💚🧡💙💕💘💖💗💘💕💗💗💓💝💟❤️💚💚💛💚💖❣️💘💖💖💗

Stuck in the Pantry: ohmygodthatwastoocute

Garfield: oh god now i’m crying 

Gremlin Boy: Oh my god you can actually cry???

Garfield: shut up-

Ant-Man: Oh!! Gonta will come and give Ryoma a hug then!!

Garfield: thanks buddy :)

Ant-Man: No problem! :D

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for such a late chapter ;-;
> 
> I was binge watching RuPaul’s Drag Race but I’m back, for a bit at least! I hope you enjoyed this chapter as much as I did writing it! I just want to thank all of you reading this because the only reason why I carried on with this was the lovely comments I get on each chapter which just keeps me going! Thank you all so very much for the positive feedback and I hope you all have a wonderful rest of the day! <3


	5. I thought you were American???

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Toko adds someone new to the group chat. Stuff happens.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AAAAAAA I’M SORRY FOR SUCH A LATE CHAPTER QWQ
> 
> I’ve been caught up with other stuff and hhhhhhhh- I hope you enjoy this chapter and here comes a new ship ;)
> 
> Also this chapter might be pretty short but I have plans for next chapter that’ll be longer, hehe!
> 
> Some usernames that haven’t shown up before:
> 
> Toko - Scissor Sisters  
> Komaru - Egg 2/Egg Queen  
> Chihiro - Hacker Man
> 
> For the Simp Chat:
> 
> Chihiro (He ain’t a simp, he just there to make sure nothing gets too out of hand-) - Bean
> 
> Makoto - Simp but egg jokes
> 
> Mondo - Bike (simp edition)
> 
> Souda (also this was the group chat he was supposed to send the picture of Gundham to 🤡) - Ultimate Simp
> 
> Gundham - Simp with animals
> 
> Ryoma - Wii Tennis Simp
> 
> Gonta - Polite Gentleman Simp
> 
> Fuuyihiko - Baby Simp

#### We Oldest But We Dumbass

Scissor Sisters: girls.

Fish: Valid.

Baseball Dave: Wait

Scissor Sisters: Yes, I am a lesbian. I thought I might as well admit it rather than try to drown in the straightness because that clearly hasn’t worked. I met someone that has made my life a lot brighter and made me open my eyes and made me realise that I had nothing to be ashamed of soo... Yes, I am a lesbian.

Fish: Where’s the valid button hold up- also :0000000 WHOM

Scissor Sisters: Do you mind if I add her here?

Fish: Not at all!!!! :D

_Scissor Sisters added 1 new contact!_

_Scissor Sisters changed 1 name!_

Egg 2: Hello!!!! It’s really nice to meet you all finally!! :D

Egg: ...................... Komaru????

Egg 2: Yes?

Egg: It’s me, your brother, Makoto,,,,,

Egg 2: OH FUCK I THOUGHT TANGERINE WAS TALKING ABOUT A DIFFERENT MAKOTO OH NO PLEASE DON’T TELL MOM AND DAD QWQ

Egg: I wasn’t planning to??? Also, Tangerine?????

Scissor Sisters: ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,

Egg 2: Funny story...

Scissor Sisters: NOPE WE AREN’T TELLING THEM THAT-

Egg 2: Toko somehow got tangerine juice in her eye on our first date so now I call her tangerine uwu

Weed Man: F but seriously, that shit hurts but rip Toko that one time tbh

Egg 2: ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,, wow you guys are way nicer than I expected- 

Scissor Sisters: Everyone is pretty much fine, I guess... Apart from you know who.

Egg 2: OH YEAH THAT LITTLE BLONDE BITCH LOOKING ASS MOTHERFUCKER- 

Egg: KOMARU >:(

Egg 2: sorry but like, am I wrong though?

Egg: no but still that’s not a nice thing to say-

Bike: Sorry to interrupt everyone making fun of Byakuya but let’s not forget he was mostly responsible for Taka’s almost near death. Just sayin...

Egg 2: hE wHAT- I don’t know this Taka but dID YOU JUST SAY THAT BYAKUYA ALMOST KILLED SOMEONE??? WTF

Bike: uh yeah, pretty much.

Egg 2: ARE WE TALKING ABOUT THE SAME BYAKUYA BECAUSE IF IT WAS THE DUDE THAT TOKO LIKED FOR A BIT, I HATE HIS EVEN MORE AND IF I SEE HIM I WILL NOT HESITATE TO THROW HANDS BECAUSE I SWEAR TO GOD THE THINGS HE HAS DONE TO TOKO DISGUST THE HELL OUT OF ME BUT NOW I’M JUST MORE DISGUSTED WITH HIM, WHOEVER THIS TAKA PERSON IS, I SEND MY WISHES AND MY FRIENDSHIP.

Bike: good. I now present to you,,, Taka @The All Mighty Hall Monitor 

The All Mighty Hall Monitor: I may not agree with your choice of words but I do appreciate your concern! It is also nice to see Toko come to terms with her true self and I wish you both the best! :)

Egg 2: qwq thank yoooouuuuu and I wish you the best!

Weed: yooooooooooooo who be this girl?

Egg 2: Hiiiii I’m Komaru! :D I’m Makoto’s sister and Toko’s girlfriend!

Weed: Ayyyyyyyyy finally! I’m glad she got over Byaku*a

Bitch Better Have My Money: Is it necessary to censor my name?

Egg 2: Yes.

Weed: Why else would I have done it?

Bitch Better Have My Money: Probably because you’re all to immature and naive to handle the real world. Probably explains why Hagakure is a two years older than us all and still in high school.

Weed: I was held back two years- 

Egg 2: >:( You just have to go attack people who are better than you, don’t you? You just love making people like shit because it just makes your sad, sad soul feel better! You’re sad, Byakuya Togami! Go get a life and stop putting others down to bring yourself up because you just look like an asshole doing that! I know that you’re family doesn’t actually earn the money they gain. They steal it. I have to buy a man’s groceries for him almost every single week because he’s an enormous debt thanks to your family!! He is also a very lovely man and that’s only one among the serveral people your ‘hard-working, loyal’ family has stolen from!

Despair Queen: GO OFF SIS! DRAAAAAAAAG THAT ASSHOLE. YOU’RE GIVING ME A RUN FOR MY CROWN! But you’ll never beat me lmaoooooo

_**Hacker Man changed Egg 2’s username to Egg Queen** _

Egg Queen: You sure?

Despair Queen: I-

Scissor Sisters: If you insult her or anything of the sorts, I will chop off all your hair at an angle.

Despair Queen: AAAAAA NOOOOOOO NOT THE ANGLE CUTTTTTT EWWWWWWWWWWW

Scissor Sisters: That’s what I thought. Dusty bitch-

Egg Queen: okay that’s enough toko, i want cuddles uwu

Scissor Sisters: omw :)

Egg: As much as this is really odd for me, congratulations!

#### DM to Hacker Man

Egg: Should we add them to the Simp chat?

Hacker man: mmmmmmmm sure!

#### We be Simping 😔🤡

_**Hacker Man added 2 contacts!** _

Ultimate Simp: owo

Baby Simp: Go die.

Komaru: I- What??

Bike (Simp Edition): Welcome to hell. This is where most of the relationship people come to or people who are crushing with the exception of Chihiro who’s just here to make sure we (Souda) doesn’t simp wayyy too much.

Ultimate Simp: You’re just jealous I actually have a boyfriend, butter boy

Bike (Simp Edition): WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU JUST CALL ME-

Ultimate Simp: Butter boy.

Bike (Simp Edition): YOU WANT TO FUCKING GO, BRO??? I’LL PUMMEL YOU INTO A FUCKING BLACK HOLS, BITCH-

Ultimate Simp: ok butter boy

Komaru: what the heck,,,,,

Simp but egg jokes: Sorry qwq this happens a lot,,,,

Komaru: Makoto?? What are you doing here??

Ultimate Simp: LMAOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO EGG JOKES FOREVER but how do you know makoto, fam-

Komaru: He’s my brother! :D

Toko: I’m not a fucking simp

Wii Tennis Simp: watch your fucking language, guys.

Bike (Simp Edition): SOUDA CALLED ME BUTTER BOY THOUGH.

Wii Tennis Simp: ok.

Komaru: seriously what the heckkkkkk....

Polite Gentleman Simp: Gonta greets the new people!! Welcome!! :D

Komaru: omg,,,, i think we’re going to be great friends, Gonta!

Polite Gentleman Simp: :DDDDD Really???

Komaru: Of course!

Komaru: HOLY HECK IS THAT THE FIRE ALARM???

Toko: .... Yes. Unfortunately...

Komaru: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

Polite Gentleman Simp: Don’t yell, friend!

~

The students ended up standing outside for 1 hour while pretty much drenched by the sprinklers. Nobody was happy. They were either screaming just like Komaru (She was actually the only person screaming and multiple people were confused about her being there), hugging someone, on their phones or talking with others about what they thought happened.

Turns out it was a piece of toast that was left in the toaster for too long...

Crazy, huh?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The toaster/toast story was actually true lmao, it happened to me (minus the sprinklers) qwq
> 
> ALSO I’M OLDER NOW YAAAAAAAY IT WAS MY BIRTHDAY ON THE 11TH UWU


End file.
